


The Gap Between

by toesohnoes



Category: Supernatural
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-18
Updated: 2011-09-18
Packaged: 2017-10-23 20:35:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/254714
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toesohnoes/pseuds/toesohnoes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John finds out what Castiel really is.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Gap Between

**Author's Note:**

> This is an AU snippet written at my [Tumblr](http://toestastegood-fic.tumblr.com/post/10169806374/if-you-take-another-step-ill-shoot-you-john).

“If you take another step I’ll shoot you,” John says.

Castiel looks down at the shotgun resting over John’s lap. He holds his tongue and doesn’t say the truth: he could burn John to ash before he even managed to aim.

Yet he stays where he is, stranded on the opposite side of the room, and watches John. The anguish on his face is recognisable after deceptive months at his side. It’s an expression he usually wears when thinking of Mary (constantly). Now it is Castiel who carries the blame.

John looks down for a moment, at the wedding ring that still chases its way around his finger. “What are you?” he asks eventually.

Castiel has told him that once before. “I am an angel of the lord,” he states.

“Don’t,” John says. “Don’t even try that shit again. I want the truth this time.”

Castiel pauses. “I am an angel of the lord,” he says once more. “This isn’t a lie.”

“Everything’s a lie with you.” John’s hands flex like he sorely wants the opportunity to punch something. “Fuck, you let me think…”

He doesn’t finish his thought, and for that Castiel finds himself grateful.

There is a swell of pity in his chest. Around John and his family, emotions have become unruly and common occurrences. He still finds himself unsure on how to handle them.

“I did not deceive you,” Castiel says. “I never claimed to be human.”

“Yeah, I’m gonna have to start quizzing people on their species when I first meet them,” John mutters. Castiel doubts that such a blunt line of questioning would suit humankind in general – but he acknowledges that his own social skills are limited when it comes to such matters. “I’m going to kill you, you know. I’ll find a way.”

Castiel feels no fear, only a lingering sorrow. “I’m on your side,” he insists. “I protected you.” He has protected John and his sons for years before John ever knew of his existence – he knows he will receive no thanks for his involvement in their lives. Before he interacted with John on a personal level, he had never found this disturbing.

John looks up at him, finally, and there’s something hard and brittle in his eyes, something that Castiel had started to see soften in the passing months.

“I protect myself,” John insists.

There’s no arguing with him.

Castiel leaves before the gun can be used – he retreats back to the shadows of his kind, to the invisibility and shame of watching.


End file.
